Exactly one year to the day that we found out he had taken off to Hawaii and turned off his phone, it seems the office of Scotty From Marketing has been uncontactable for a couple days now.

This comes as New South Wales reaches tipping point with a pre-Christmas COVID-19 outbreak.

The Avalon cluster grew to 38 cases up to 8pm on Saturday and residents of the northern beaches have entered an enforced lockdown until midnight on Wednesday.

The New South Wales premier, Gladys Berejiklian, has warned residents of greater Sydney to prepare for an increase in restrictions if this continues to expand beyond the Northern Beaches.

Since the first cases began popping up, the state leaders has been fronting press conferences every morning to keep their constituents updated on any changes they might have to make to Christmas plans as softer border restrictions begin to fall into place.

In scenes all too familiar to this exact time last December, the Prime Minister has gone missing – and has left the gruelling crisis management to the same state leaders he has berated all year for not opening up their borders earlier.

The fact that the Prime Minister’s own office won’t confirm his location has all but clarified the sinking feeling in the stomachs of all Australians, who thought he would be smarter than this.

Staying true to his bureaucratic public servant roots, Scotty From Marketing has once gain refused to let a national crisis get in the way of his holiday plans – even if the rest of the country are being forced to change theirs.

However, as the Cronulla Happy Clapper enjoys his 7th holiday with the family since being elected mid-way through last year, the Sky News pundits and their Quiet Australian cult followers have been quick to rush to his defence.

Paul Murray and Andrew Bolt have been ordered by their editorial propagandists to insist that the bloke deserves a holiday, even after his well received trip to Hawaii last year which timed perfectly with all those poor fireys who kept getting killed during record-breaking climate-change aided bushfires.

The Betoota Advocate reached out to the Prime Minister’s office for comment but were told that he doesn’t hold a ventilator, mate.



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