It’s that time of the year.

The kids are off school, the extended family is starting to make tracks to the designated household, and the nation’s boyfriends and dads are rushing around trying to discreetly do their last minute Christmas shopping.

George Bracks (42), from Betoota’s Flight Path District, would argue this isn’t last minute at all.

He’s still got like 5, maybe 4 days until the big do. He thinks. It’s hard because he can’t ever remember if Christmas Day is the 25th or 26th – and if he asks his wife for clarification, he’ll once again be accused of not being prepared.

Either way, he’s got plenty of reasons to leave the house. The barbie could be out of gas? Or he might’ve secured a cheap ham.

It’s too early to say he’s picking up prawns, but with countless family lunches and dinners ahead of him – George can slip out of the house at any time.

Today, the white lie was that he needed to ‘go organise the gravy’ – not one of his best.

After three hours of driving between shopping centres and backing out last minute on extremely expensive gifts, George finds himself in a familiar situation.

Every single one of his kids will be getting the same present.

And his wife, well. She’s hard to find gifts for.

With his phone now buzzing with text messages demanding to know why it takes this long to buy beef stock and flower, George is now convincing himself that the major auto store on the highway home is where he’ll get the wife her Christmas gift.

“Those stock tyres are a little dull” he tells himself.

“She loves shiny stuff. And these hubcaps are sold individually, so it’s technically four presents”

“It’s a no-brainer really”


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here