24 October 2016. 11:25


Local mum, Liz Carrage (52) has disgusted her children at breakfast yesterday by revealing a little bit too much about what she used to get up to in her twenties, before she met their dad.

Her three adult children got the message pretty early on, as their mum implied she used to follow touring rock bands around Brisbane – and used to ‘hang out’ with former rugby league greats.

Upon learning that her oldest son, Anthony (27) was hungover from a large night with friends the night before, Mrs Carrage decided to make his morning a whole lot worse by implying that she used to root heaps of blokes when she was younger.

“I was a wild child in my day” say Mrs Carrage.

“Spent a bit of time following the Go-Betweens on tour, or at the footy club with the old Valley players. Me and your aunty Sal used to really… get… around,”

While her children look at each other with squinted eyes, her husband of thirty years, Jamie decides to join in on the action.

“Reckon the kids today could have kept up with you, love?”

Mrs Carrage replies.

“Not at all. Youngsters these days don’t have the… Stamina,”

Anthony Carrage then decides to leave the table, fearing he is about to throw up.

Speaking to the Betoota Advocate later, he says it’s fucking crook that they talk like that.

“I don’t need to hear that shit,” he says.

“I don’t know why the fuck dad thinks it’s funny. He’s out there egging her on to talk about all the blokes she used to root,”

With her 55th birthday coming up, Mrs Carrage has made several disgusting references to the hotel room her husband has booked for her on the Gold Coast.

“Let’s just say there will be a ‘do not disturb’ sign on that door knob,” she says.

Mr Carrage responds.

“Unless a few of those old Broncos players wanna join us [laughter]”




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