An early-40s Peter Pan has been humbled today by a thick stream of back-to-school photos in his Facebook newsfeed.

As the ghosts of girlfriends past re-enter his life in jpeg images that show them walking to school with their adorable young kids, Ben Whiston wonders if all of those trips to South America were worth it.

Ben says he’s been rattled by one photo in particular.

Ex-girlfriend, Sally, who finally gave him the flick when he refused to buy a bed frame for his king-size mattress after three years, is living the exact life he had imagined he would be living – had he not spent the last two decades doing the exact same shit he did when he was 19.

“Could have been me, I spose” he says.

“But that was never gonna last man, she was just so focused on monogamy. She kept acting like we were living in the 50s, man”.

“It was 2008 and she was trying to make me commit only to her”

With a boys trip to Bali with some younger mates coming up in a few days, Ben doesn’t imagine these introspective thoughts will last too long.

“Man. First stop… Mushie mountain [haha]”


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