Politics

African-Australian Community Praying That Pauline Doesn’t Turn On Them Next

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Following the news that One Nation leader Pauline has pledged to ban the burqa from all government buildings if her party wins the Queensland state election, some of the lower-profile migrant communities are now worried that the champion of white working class insecurities will turn her laser towards them. "We are quite worried" says African-Australian...

Di Natale Feeling Recharged After Leaving Crystals Out To Harness Energy Of Full Moon

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Green's Senator and party leader, Richard Di Natale, says he is feeling like a new man after leaving his collection of semi precious stones out on Friday night. Speaking to The Betoota Advocate today, Senator Di Natale says he feels like he got very lucky being able to land a full moon so close to the...

Habitual drink driver explains to wife how Meryl Streep is a communist

10 January, 2017. 12:23 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact This time last year, Gopher Jones was your run-of-the-mill small town conservative who only had the best interests of his community at heart. Since being old enough to drink in Brisbane, he's cast his vote toward the Coalition. However, something happened to the out-of-work carpet layer late last year that's beginning to...

Vietnam Vets Accused Of Taking Tax-Payer Funded Helicopters To Liberal Party Function

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Federal Health Minister Sussan Ley will stand aside without pay while a review is undertaken into claiming of travel entitlements for a May 2015 trip to the resort city where she impulse purchased a $795,000 apartment from a Liberal Party donor. This comes not even eighteen months after Brownwyn Bishop's Choppergate, that saw her resign after her abuse of travel entitlements that...

PM Drops Casual C-Bomb During Press Conference To See If Anyone Is Listening

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull has been littering all of his recent media appearances with an array of horrifically offensive swear words, including the notorious c-bomb. Turnbull, who is renowned for his ability to not make as many gaffes as the last three Prime Ministers, was believed to be 'testing the waters' to see if anyone even cares about...

George Christensen to receive Clive Palmer’s hand-me-downs after stunning weight loss journey

15 December, 2016. 14:34 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Rather than hurl his Big & Tall™ bespoke suits into the Sanctuary Cove charity clothing bin, former parliamentarian Clive Palmer has reached out to one-time rival George Christensen with a very generous offer. Since retiring from public life, Mr Palmer is midway through his inspiring weight-loss journey that's seen him shed over 49kg -...

Aboriginal Ringer Agrees With Pauline On Everything Except The Bit About Him Not Existing

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Betoota stockman, Andy Vandercoup, says that as a full time cattleman he is naturally quite conservative. He doesn't care too much for the Queensland Labor Government's attempts at disempowering his local area by restricting graziers rights to land clearing. He also doesn't like terrorism. It is for these reasons, and many others, that he will probably see himself steering away from...

Report: Dick Smith Probably Says Horrifying Things About Brown People After A Few Reds

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Following revelations that Australia food and electronics magnate, Dick Smith, has become a full-blown North Shore baby boomer, a study has been released by a leading sociological Government research body which was determined to find out what kind of bloke he would be at a dinner party. The former Australian of the Year has this week publicly thrown his support...

Local Man Can’t Believe That The Psychopaths He Voted For Aren’t Getting Along

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Local man, Breece Birley (32) says he is a little disappointed to learn that the One Nation party is starting to crack. "It's a shame mate. They were really onto something" "I can't believe that a party of four federal senators with no experience working with anyone else weren't able to tackle Canberra head on" Birley says that five months ago...

Majority Of Tony Burke’s Public Appearances Spent Explaining That He Isn’t Andrew Gaze

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The Member for Watson's office have today confirmed that majority of Tony Burke's public appearances are spent explaining to punters that he isn't that bloke who played in the NBL between 1985 and 2005. This comes as the former ALP Minister for the Arts and Immigration was seen informing several of his own constituents in Lakemba that he is...

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