The Betoota Dolphins Reserve Grade halfback has done his best to look physically intimidating while running out onto the field last weekend.

The young half for the dolphins Jasper Horder (21) is a stereotypical number 7. Smaller than all of his teammates, better looking than most and diagnosed with ‘little man syndrome,’ the arrogant playmaker trotted through the tunnel like a beast.

He’s switched on, he’s super serious and puffing his cheeks out as he exhales.

Horder, with long flowing hair that oozes confidence and self-respect, told our reporters that he actually thinks he’s actually pretty handy in a scrap.

“Mate, when you are my size and you walk around like you should be playing footy for money, you’ve gotta be smart about how you play these things,” he said.

“So what I like to do just after kick off to add to the aura of me running on like a big dog, is immediately sprint up to the opposition player who has made the first error and try and rip the ball out of his hands,” he explained.

“Because everyone’s fresh, it’s tight in the middle and all the forwards steam in if anyone tries to shape up. I’ve done it hundreds of times and have never had anyone land one on me. It’s foolproof.”

Horder’s teammate James Jackson told The Advocate that he knows exactly what his half is playing at.

“He wouldn’t hit water if he fell out of a boat the cunt” Jackson said.

“But he is smarter than most of us, so if anyone tries to get into him he just embarrasses them with his words in front of the team.”



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