LOUIS BURKE | Culture | Contact

It is clear as day to staff of Betoota Ponds Maccas that regular customer Aemon Trot (38) has had a flop of a day and has called for a naughty meal to lift his spirits.

While usually known for his childlike joy while ordering a large double quarter pounder meal with a coke no sugar, drive thru worker Matilda Copping (17) noted that Trot’s tone was morose and downtrodden even though he decided to spruce up his order a bit.

“And a six pack of nuggets thanks,” grumbled Trot into the microphone like his descendants will one day do for all their meals if he ever gets round to procreating. 

“Actually…I’ll have a ten pack of nuggets.”

According to Trot, his day has been sufficiently shit enough to double down on the calories and make his usual Maccas his ‘naughty meal’ by adding ten pieces of bite sized chicken that may just be more addictive than a fresh deck of cigarettes. 

“I can still hear me boss getting crook at me about fuck knows what…nuggets make sense. Nuggets help.”

At the time of writing, Trot claims to be in the happy place having just finished his high-calorie meal and states he will not experience the post-binge regret until his drink is finished.


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