7 December, 2016. 19:34

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

THE LATEST COOKBOOK by British chef Nigella Lawson has whipped up fresh controversy this afternoon after it was revealed by the publisher that it features a recipe for hash brownies that’s taken Gen Y by storm.

Dubiously telling readers that they’re ‘only allowed to make the brownies where cannabis is legal,’ many directionless, sheltered teens and young adults have been singing Lawson’s praised for her culinary bravery.

Jennifer Collar’s mother used to smell her clothes and fingers when she’d return from a night out drinking with boys in the park – looking for hints of naughtiness.

By age 17, she’d caught her smoking the sticky stuff a number of times and scalded her appropriately. Sometimes she could smell the tobacco on her fingers.

“I didn’t know what to do,” said Jen. “My life was so unfulfilling, scary and boring that I didn’t really have much to do except get high in the park and snog boys until my Dad came looking for me.”

“They could always tell that I was high on the pot. Apparently, I just reeked of the stuff. But now thanks to Nigella, I can smell like my Peach Impulse body spray but still be higher than Molly Meldrum at a Tame Impala show.”

Jennifer’s sentiments were echoed by classmate Darren, who used to watch Nigella just for the camerawork.

However, the 18-year-old now has an entirely new reason to watch the show.

“You know, I used to watch the show because of the editing and whatnot. I also enjoyed when she stirs pots of things vigorously. That’s also great. But now she’s gone and made some delicious brownies that include my favourite herb,” he said.

“She is a buffalo soldier.”

More to come.




Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here