ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

The relationship between Seven and Cricket Australia is on the mend today as negotiations overnight see Steve Smith join Summer Bay’s infamous River Boys gang.

Seven’s main concerns moving forward into the summer of cricket were that they weren’t getting bang for their buck in terms of broadcast rights, so they went sour the sport’s governing body and only paid them part of what they owed.

Cricket Australia, keen to resolve this issue quickly before India arrive in Australia next month, offered up a number of solutions to keep the money rolling in.

One of them being Steve Smith, one of the greatest cricketers of the modern era, make a series of cameo appearances on Home & Away.

“Steve is joining the River Boys,” said Australian coach Justin Langer.

“I think in the first episode or something, he’s blooded into the gang with some sort of killing. I think they kill one of their rivals or something, I don’t know, I don’t watch Home & Away but that’s the gist I got from Steve,”

“Look, we’re all doing our part to ease the load on Cricket Australia. I mean, I’m effectively being railroaded into private coaching sessions with these hopeless, man-boobed kids of Seven executives. Davey [Warner] is rubbing the anti-glare makeup on Kochie’s dome everyday. Gary [Lyon] has had to core and fertilise the lawns of everyone on the Seven board. It’s not been easy for us,”

“Anyway, we’re looking forward to wrapping up in England and getting home.”

The Advocate reached out to Seven for comment but were told the only person who took the time to answer this masthead’s emails at the station was Simon Reeve and he’s on the couch now.

More to come.


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