Newly appointed National Party leader and Deputy Prime Minister of Australia, Michael McCormack MP has today thrown a life raft to the regional Australian families who depend on the Murray-Darling basin but don’t farm cotton.

Following the resignation of former leader, Barnaby Joyce, there has been growing pressure placed on the National Party to finally do something about the environmental and economic disaster that is the corrupt water irrigation plans in Northern New South Wales.

The Murray–Darling basin is a large geographical area in the interior of southeastern Australia. Its name is derived from its two major rivers, the Murray River and the Darling River. The basin, which drains around one-seventh of the Australian land mass, is one of the most significant agricultural areas in Australia – crossing into every state and territory except Western Australia and Tasmania.

However, over the last few decades the entire system appears to have run dry, as people farming produce not suitable for the Australian climate divert the flow of billions of gigalitres of shared water into their own operations. Due to the wide-reaching catchment of the basin, and the New South Wales State Government’s proneness to being engaged in political corruption, this environmental disaster has become a federal issue, as the millions affected demand action.

McCormack has addressed this issue on the front foot, claiming there is a middle ground between incarcerating environmnetal vandals, and bringing work back to the lower Murray-Darling.

“Ok” he said.

“Farming is about innovation nowadays. We need to find a way to keep the cotton mob happy, as well as all the lesser farmers and the blackfellas from Bourke down”

“It’s a much harder job than you think. When you take into account political donations, personal friendships and self-conducted scientific research that this bluebloods keeps pasting on facebook”

McCormack went on to unveil his revolutionary plan to turn the dried stretch of dry earth into a 3,375 dirt bike track.

“It’ll be great. We have $13.3 billion dollar plan to provide tertiary education in canteen stocktaking and tourism operating at thousands of check points throughout the river” he said.

“Not to mention the retail aspect of dirtbike hire and sales”

“Plus it’ll keep all the townie kids occupied and out of jail. It’s a win-win”

It is not yet known if this resolution sits well with everyone in the party, but Barnaby would have done it differently he reckons.


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