WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact

In some shocking news from the Northern Shivers this morning, a Byron mum has revealed that she will eventually cave on the spicy cough jab later this year.

The local of 12 months, whose primary residence is actually listed in the inner city suburb of Brunswick, Melbourne, explained that when push comes to shove her ideological stance against the immunisers might melt away.

“Look, I’m obviously opposed to letting big pharma put that poison into my body when there’s nothing on the line, but when things like financial or lifestyle incentives are dangled in front of me, I’m a realist,” said Andrea Vachser.

“As you can tell by my decision to flee Melbourne for Byron as soon as the cases started getting announced down there, I don’t like having my lifestyle inconvenienced, so if getting the shot means I can go back to treating myself to international travel, then it is what is.”

The earth mum of Aloeisha (2) explained that she will obviously put that process off for as long as possible and won’t be informing any of her like minded friends about the decision.

“It’s the reality we face as people well off enough to make things like this one of our identity defining issues,” she said.

“But, travel defines me more and if this fascist government forces us to get the jab to travel, then who am I to stand in the face of that.”

More to come.


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