A physically imposing, but emotionally stunted man who fantasises about assaulting vulnerable people has today decided it’s time to channel his problematic personality traits into a career.

This comes after the most recent footage of Victorian cops bashing another mentally ill person.

Up to four officers have been caught on camera ramming a man with a police car, and then stomping on a his head, in a shocking video that’s now being shared on social media.

The citizen at the centre of this most recent loony bashing is reportedly now in a coma, and has a history of mental illness, his lawyer says.

John Bacon (33) says he can’t believe it’s taken him this long to realise that the Victorian Police is where he needs to be.

“I guess, I just thought my desires to assault and blind mentally ill people was something I shouldn’t share with the world. But it’s great to know there is a community out there that not only supports people like me, but encourages this type of behaviour”

As of 30 June 2017, Victoria Police had over 18,440 sworn members, including 152 recruits in training, 2 reservists, 1,390 protective services officers and 3,367 civilian staff across 332 police stations. It had a running cost of approximately A$2.78bn.

Victoria Police enjoys a high level of community confidence among non-Sudanese, mentally well Victorians, with more than 86.1% of Victorian residents feeling confident to contact the police. The general satisfaction is also high, with more than 76.9% of Victorian residents satisfied with policing services in general – unless of course they are mentally ill and have fear of being blinded by a lachrymatory agent while several failed AFL recruits drop knees in their spine.





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