Wynnum bloke, Tom Shearer (28) says he can’t understand the shock and horror surrounding the footage that emerged of a passenger being violently removed from an overbooked United Airlines flight in the US.

As someone who has been forcefully dragged off a commercial flight himself, ‘Shearsy’ reckons it’s one of the fucking funniest things that has happened to him.

“I was so fucked” he said, while explaining his 2009 flight back from Indonesia via Darwin.

“Couple dexies and half a one-point-five of duty free Bundy. I was anyones, cunt”

Mr Shearer says after changing flights in the Territory his behaviour, while the plane was still stationary, could only be described as ‘serious fucking form’.

“I’d had about 18 Bintangs between Indo and Darwin… On top of everything. I was deadset speaking Greek”

“I’d been given a few stern warnings [laughter] but I think it was when I tried to light a clove cigarette through my nose that pushed the hosties over the edge”

“And the fucking 90-year-old sitting next to me with her granddaughter. They were my biggest critics [laughter]”

With his mates seated in front of him all cheering, Mr Shearer says he was promptly ‘pretzeled’ by an AFP police officer that had been requested onto the tarmac by the airline.

“You wouldn’t know it. But carrying on like that on a flight is a federal offence, for some reason” he says.

“I got fucked on haha”

After years of red tape and legal drama, Shearsy and his mates still tell piss themselves telling yarn every Easter around the camp fire at Moreton.

“Fuck me it was funny” says Shearsy’s mate, Juddy.

“I’ve seen a chicken wing before… But this AFP guy wasn’t like any old bouncer. He nearly tore the cunt’s arms off [hysterical laughing]”

Mr Shearer says if he has any advice for the United Airlines passenger, Dr. David Dao, who was dragged off the plane in Chicago last week – it’s to get the fuck out of town.

“Hows the hide on this bloke trying to stick around to sue the airline”

“Just take your chips and run cunt… Or you’ll be flying back that city every 18 months for a court appearance”







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