The Nation

28 August, 2016. 14:34 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact THE PRIME MINITER HAS CALLED on Opposition leader Bill Shorten to stop being such a difficult c--t and help him get the controversial same-sex marriage plebiscite through parliament this week. Speaking today from the National Press Club bar, Malcolm Turnbull has hinted that the Labor Party has been deliberately obtuse with him...

28 August, 2016. 14:34 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact NAMING A CHILD THAT'S GOING to grow up on the fringe of Brisbane is a serious business. The spelling has to be unique enough to justify the father having it tattooed above his left nipple in Old English font - and the registrar needs to ask you three times if they'd spelt...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact WATCHING THE GENTLE SWELL lap against the shore from the Coogee Pavillion rooftop, Emma Hutchens smiles and feels glad she's not about to hitch up her dress and jump on the mechanical bull down at the Jube. Taking advantage of the recent unseasonably warm weather down in the harbour capital, the 23-year-old construction manager and two...

26 August, 2015 9:30 MERV HARRIS | Brisbane | CONTACT The Betoota Advocate can exclusively report that Australian movie superstar and current Foxtel ad actor Chris Hemsworth was found unconscious this morning in the Botanic Gardens in Brisbane, surrounded by bits of a half-eaten kebab and his right arm covered in entry stamps. Reports have emerged that Hemsworth and fellow Avengers actor Tom Hiddleston had...

25 August, 2015 9:30 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Photographs have emerged of armed Queensland police officers confronting an overweight Sydney man on an artificial beach and making him remove some of his clothing, as part of a controversial ban on all NSW Blues merchandise. Authorities in several Queensland towns have implemented bans on the NSW Origin kit, which covers the body and head, citing...

25 August, 2016. 13:02 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact SOME PEOPLE CALL THEM bin chickens, others call them the great white pigeon - but former cricketer turned television presenter Mike Whitney might be calling them lunch, after declaring he'd chow down on an ibis for a hundred clams. As the host of Australia's finest, but shortest lived reality television programme, Who...

24 August, 2016. 11:20 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Dubbo cop, Darren Goodyear (42), has for many years fought tooth and nail to express himself through body art - in an attempt to defend the tattoos he already on his forearms. After years of complaints and submissions from fellow inked up policemen and women, state police commissioner, Andrew Scipione has ruled that...

23 August, 2016. 17:20 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT NSW Premier Mike Baird has become the first person to ever fracture a vertebra without even having a spine after falling down a set of stairs at his home on Saturday night. Mr Baird said he was facing a "slowish recovery" but would not need surgery. A scan on Monday revealed the extent of...

23 August, 2016. 16:45 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact ERNEST LUDERICK HAS A LOT of time to think about his life and where things went wrong. He's not unemployed, nor is he underemployed. Whether it was a youth misspent smoking reefer between drama classes or his inability to respect authority - he's still unsure. But for the past four years, the 46-year-old has...

22 August, 2016. 10:23 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact SOMETIMES JESUS DECIDES TO take one of his children down a peg, last night it was NSW Premier Mike Baird. Explaining to The Advocate this morning via Skype, the Holy Spirit said he wanted to restore some order to the universe - which in recent months has been tipped heavily toward the...