Local News

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA millennial Marketing Manager has today realised she’s officially ticked over into the ‘older colleague category’, after spending an entire day baffled by the constant barrage of slang words mentioned in a single office meeting. Jen Bowen, 32 had been well aware this time would come, but had idea just how comfortable Gen Z are using slang language in...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactAn innocent quest to find a groceries list has unfortunately resulted in local bloke Taylor Hardern questioning everything he knows about his relationship, after discovering a rather dubious looking list on his girlfriend Kayla’s phone. It’s alleged this incident occurred last Sunday at the Betoota Heights Greengrocers, where the happy couple were seen laughing and joking as they collected...

MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACTNo stranger to the pain of a needle and some ink, a local girl has today found herself dreading something even more painful than an hour of a sharp needle dragging through her raw flesh, tattoo small talk. Local French Quarter girl Georgia Rose (24) was excited to see that one of her favourite tattoo artists was in town...

MONTY BENFICA | Amusements | CONTACTIn a complete display in lack of Self Awareness, Betoota Heights man, Mitchell Smith (30) has bravely declared that Vegans should really stop making being vegan their entire personality. As one of the biggest problems facing the Australian meat industry, Mitchell believes Vegans really need an attitude change, while his passion for all things meat is nothing more...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA nail salon located in Betoota Heights Westfield shopping centre has faced an uptick in complaints this week, as reports come that the usual overbearing stench of ammonia had reached ‘nuclear levels.’ The Advocate learns many of the centre's regulars have long known to give ‘Mimi’s Salon’ a wide berth when traipsing up and down the aisles, citing that...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactAs she snuggles up on the couch to watch the latest season of her favourite reality TV show, local woman Rhiannon Hutton can feel a dark energy emanating from her periphery view. Fuck sake, she knows this routine all too well. In fact, she can pretty much guess exactly what will come out of his mouth next. “What’s this shit?”,...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA Betoota Heights woman with some rather picky dating criteria has found out some truly awful news this week, which is set to have a massive impact on her newfound interest in Formula One. Caitlin Gillard reportedly became mesmerised by the world of motorsports shortly before the Grand Prix in Melbourne this year, as her Tik Tok for you...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact As the housing crunch continues to trouble our cosmopolitan desert community, a young couple has decided to make life much harder for themselves by getting a dog. While having a dog doesn't disqualify you from applying for a rental property in the Diamantina Shire Council area, any potential landlord can choose not to offer a...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA Brisbane woman has been forced to fight back with her secret weapon this week, after copping an absolute rinsing for her pronunciation of the word ‘Prahran’,  It’s alleged Alicia Stone was staying with her friend Nala over the weekend when she committed the very common faux pas, innocently remarking that Prahran was such a cute area to live...

EFFIE BATEMAN | Lifestyle | ContactA Betoota Heights woman who has finally managed to get her boyfriend to stop dressing like a divorced dad has unfortunately learnt that no good deed goes unpunished, as she’s now made him infinitely more appealing to the ladies. It’s alleged Harley Bennett had spent a solid year working on this passion project, having resorted to a number of...