As rugby season kicks off, it has become clear that New Zealand and France still hate each other, not just in sport, but also on both a cultural and political level.

Local South Betoota scaffolder, Benji Wellington says he’s not sure why there’s so much beef there, but he’s been raised to hate those filthy frogs – not just by the media – but also by his teachers, parents and politicians.

“I think it had something to do with that boat, bro” he says.

“Fucks me what it was about. I think it was like a gay boat?

Rainbow Warrior was a Greenpeace ship active in supporting a number of anti-whaling, anti-seal hunting, anti-nuclear testing and anti-nuclear waste dumping campaigns during the late 1970s and early 1980s. The ship was bombed in the Port of Auckland in New Zealand by operatives of the French intelligence service (DGSE) on 10 July 1985, sinking the ship and killing photographer Fernando Pereira.

Since this event in 1985, and several refereeing discrepancies involving French rugby officials later, the frosty relationship between the two countries still holds strong.

New Zealand Prime Minister Jacinda Adern says it’s true. She still hates nuclear stuff and still hates the fucking French.

“Fuck ’em” she said.

“They’re not welcome here. Neither are the Americans – in our waters that is”

When asked if there was any French diplomats that she would be willing to sit down and talk to resolve these hostile relations, Adern said ‘not many, if any’.



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