While Newcastle Sydney and Wollongong (NSW) are still facing an indefinite period in lockdown as a result of incompetent state and federal leaders, there is some good news to report this week.

Health Minister Brad ‘The Breakfast Sausage In A Suit’ Hazzard has faced the media to claim that his state is jabbing people at a ‘faster rate than anywhere in the world.’

The claim reeking of political opportunism comes as NSW begins to rival global titans like Kazakhstan for double dose jab rates.

“Right now, no one is putting jabs into arms as fast per capita as we are,” said the Health Minister of one of the most privileged regions in the world, who is still 30ish% behind public health champions like the United States of America.

“I don’t want to talk about how we have only just reached 30% of our population being double jabbed, I want to talk about the rate we are going at currently.”

“The fact that we missed the start by a few months because of the ineptitude of the big boss has nothing to do with how fast we are rolling out the jabs,” continued Hazzard today.

“So, right now, before we naturally slow down like the rest of the world we are going faster than anyone else.”

“And that means us politicians should be patting ourselves on the back”

Hazzard then refused to answer any questions about why the rollout had taken so long if they were so capable, and hung up the phone.

More to come.


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