ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

A growing number of Australians to not want to get jabbed, according to a new survey released today.

Nearly all Australians who are hesitant to get cured of the Melbourne Mumps have said they don’t want it because they don’t trust the bi-pedal, neckless pigs that trot the halls of Parliament House in Canberra.

Our reporter took to the streets this afternoon to gauge the local reaction to the survey.

“The amount of fuck up in the past year, why the fuck should I trust the cunts with my health?” said one local man.

“Mistake after mistake after mistake. They can go and get fucked. Especially that fucking Linda Reynolds. She’s up there with the fucking worst them.”

The denizens of our cosmopolitan desert republic didn’t spare the Labor Party or The Greens, either.

Another local woman took the high-paid bleeding hearts to task.

“They’re just Liberals in footy jerseys,” she said.

“I mean, the way Labor kissed ScoMo’s feet over that Migration Amendment (Clarifying International Obligations for Removal) Bill 2021 earlier this week. They all just rolled over, Penny Wong and Billy Boy Shorten included, and let the government make it legal to detain and hold refugees indefinitely. Once their case has been heard and they haven’t been granted asylum, they either go back to their home country or stay in immigration detention indefinitely. I mean, fuck me dead. Why is life even worth living?”

“The Greens? I’m not even going to waste my breath.”

When asked about The Nationals, the man our reporter first spoke to had to be physically restrained after attempting to throw himself under a passing tram.

“If they want the trust of the public back, they need to be held accountable for their actions like everyone else is. Until that happens, politicians will own the same level of respect the public has for soccer.”

More to come.


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