ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

There are many symbiotic relationships in nature – but none seem stronger than the one forged between two Old City District hospitality staff this week.

The sous chef at the fabled Gelded Goanna Inn on Daroo Street said he and a barman in the local’s sportsbar part of the hotel have struck up a friendship where ‘one is fed and the other is watered’.

The Advocate was invited to join chef Oscar Hebert in the loading dock of the Gelded Goanna to watch him smoke the other half of the cigarette he was smoking when the bus to work turned up six minutes early.

He explained that every chef needs a barman and every barman needs a chef.

“Otherwise, you might end up paying full freight for a beer after work,” he said.

“But you can’t befriend any old barman. You have to find one that’s on your level, one a bit cluey. One that’s been to university and is wallowing in the Zoloft-laced swamp of underemployment – that’s the barman you’re looking for,”

“Me and the bloke in the sportsbar, Mike, look after each other. I sneak him a club sandwich and ask him to try things when he’s bringing the dirty plates in for the dish pig. Mike puts a few jugs down as wastage for me at the end of a shift. What the owner doesn’t know won’t hurt him.”

Unbeknown to Oscar, the Gelded Goanna is owned by Betoota’s prominent Overell family – namely Clive Overell, brother of The Advocate’s editor Clancy Overell.

Our reporter phoned Clive a short time ago and requested comment on the brazen theft of stock by his staff.

However, Clive said he didn’t mind.

“As long as they both keep giving free drinks and food to the old farts playing the pokies, I don’t care,”

“Speaking of which, Errol, can you get my brother to pay his tick? Does he think that sticky bikie hydro shit grows on trees? He also put $600 of my money through Pelican Pete last week and I’m getting tired of his excuses,”

“Tell Clancy to call me.”

More to come.


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here