31 August, 2015 11:30

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

IN WHAT’S BEING INTERPRETED as a thinly veiled attempt to deflect some of the self-loathing Nathan Truman has for himself, the 27-year-old petrol station attendant has made his various display pictures across his social media accounts images of him as a baby.

“Look man, I’m just working with what I’ve got,” he said.

“Everybody loves babies. Not everybody likes 30-year-old men with thick necks and no hair. But yeah, I’m picking up what you’re putting down, mate. It’s very tactical, but I still get that sinking feeling whenever I log into Facebook and it reckons someone’s tagged me in a photo,”

“But I have redeeming qualities that aren’t exactly physical, but it’s 2016 and nobody gives a shit about that. Sometimes when I walking through town and I catch a glimpse of myself in a shopfront, I think, ‘fuck man, what happened,’ but then I remember that I’m a mad cunt and I’ve crushed more box than most of my mates – just because I’m such a grouse cunt and the ladies love it.” he said.

Mr Truman isn’t alone in this facade.

Thousands of other plain looking Australians have opted to use their baby photos as their display pictures for a number of years now. One of them is Bernice Tuna, a 48-year-old bottled water specialist from Gympie, on the state’s true Sunshine Coast.

“I’ve had a picture of me from 1977 as my Facebook profile picture since 2008,” she said.

“I do this because father time hasn’t been nice to me. My skin hangs off my bones like an old deflated basketball hangs off a gutter. But I was a happening youngster back in the late 70s. So I thought I’d use my foxiest picture,”

“There’s already enough shit on the internet.” she said.



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