15 August, 2016. 12:34

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

CLUTCHING AN ORGANIC AVOCADO, smelling it for ripeness, Andrew ‘Woodrow’ Coolidge strode through his local farmers market with one burning question on his tongue.

Farmers make a lot of money and most of them aren’t afraid to spend it on things they don’t really need, so why do farmers drive such ugly cars?

“They’re big, ugly and green. My God, that shade of green is just disgusting! I’ve seen red ones before and yellow ones but they’re just as bad,” he said.

“I just don’t get it. Why do they have all these random parts on them that go up and down and twirl around? Is it a cultural thing? I know they love their utes, dark spirits and fist fights but these things are on a whole other level,”

“And those ones that spill the seeds out of them? Why do they look like that? Surely somebody has dropped the ball. Even I could design pretty cars for farmers than what they have now.”

Speaking to The Advocate this morning, Ivanhoe grazier Martin Scottsdale said he agrees that some farmers cars, or tractors as they’re known to industry insiders, can be quite ugly.

But he stopped short of saying he understood Mr Coolidge’s ignorance when it comes to primary industry.

“Look, you’ve got these blokes that look like an old pillow that’s had years ear infections leak out onto it who have these opinions that just don’t belong out here,” he said.

“Food doesn’t just grow on trees. Sometimes it grows underground, sometimes underwater even. Some farmers use their ugly cars to make the job a bit easier. But whatever, it doesn’t really worry me.” he said.



Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here