DANIEL GOSS | Consumer Affairs | Contact

Two years ago, Roger Dalton paid close to five hundred clams for his compulsory third party insurance.

This year it was over $900.

The 21-year-old student was forced to relocate to Sydney from Betoota earlier this year as neither side of the government honestly cares about regional infrastructure enough to follow through with any tangible plan for the future.

“It’s sad, but ultimately true,” said Roger.

“I had to move to Sydney to study because they didn’t carry my medical degree at any of the Betoota TAFE colleges, despite Sir Joh promising to make it happen in the 80s,”

“Anyway, moving to that glorified brothel town was just something I had to do – and because the public transport down there is just fucked, I had to take my car down.”

A number of major insurers quoted the broke Cancerian, but they all returned figures of nearly a thousand dollars for one year’s insurance.

But rather than suck it up and let the insurance companies win, Roger bowled over a pedestrian this morning in what local police describe as a tragic accident.

Gregory Tallen was taken to hospital shortly after being clipped by Roger around 9am local time.

He’s currently listed as being in a stable condition with multiple fractures to his legs, arms and back.

“I hope he gets a huge payout,” said Roger.

“A real big one.”

More to come.


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