WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet Reporter | Contact

Friends have berated young Leo Davidson this morning after he thought it perfectly normal to blow his nose with a handkerchief.

The young man from the small honest country town of Woodenbong in NSW’s north east, said he has been using handkerchiefs his whole life and cannot see what’s odd about it.

“I remember my grandma gave me one with my initials sewn into it for my 8th birthday. I’ve still got it you know. I don’t really use it anymore though. It’s more of a sentimental thing,” he said.

Now living in the trendy Victorian city of Melbourne the accountant said that it doesn’t make sense to be using tissues all the time when you can just use hankies.

“All of these fucking climate change warriors are happy to burn through boxes of tissues during winter, because they think hankies are “gross?”” he asked, “Give me a break.”

Colleague Jarrod Merryment told the Advocate everyone at work thinks it’s pretty weird.

“He blows his brains out on that thing and then just shoves it back in his pocket. I haven’t seen him with a different one for a fair while now, so I can’t imagine he washes it….”

Leo happily confirmed the allegations that he has over 200 plastic bags stored away in the cupboard.

“Sometimes I think I was born 60 years too late. My generation is just so bloody wasteful. They don’t know the value of anything and just consume whatever is in their path, regardless of need,” he said.

More to come.


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