ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

The nation’s stock of English, Irish and American backpackers joined together yesterday on Sydney’s Bronte Beach to launch an attack on our nation’s collective efforts to contain this fucking pangolin curse and make sure it doesn’t get completely out of hand.

People from these counties are preferred migrants, according to Home Affairs Minister Peter Dutton, who said the behaviour shown on that beachhead yesterday was nothing short of disgraceful.

“Very disappointing but you can’t stop young people from having fun – and that’s all they were having. Fun,” he said.

“I can only hope police will investigate it. You know Scott Morrison is from Bronte and I can assure you that he’s very disappointed to see his home town’s name be dragged through the mud,”

“He said Bronte was like a little working-class country town when he grew up there. Now, it’s full of these very disappointing people. But we love the Irish and the English. We love the Americans more. They’re just here to have a good time, let them be. Who is this interview for again? The Advertiser?”

Our reporter said yes.

“Problems you guys don’t have down in Adelaide!” laughed Peter.

The Advocate reached out to the New South Wales Eastern Suburbs LAC for comment but were told that boys will be boys and girls will be girls.

More to come.


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