13 December, 2016. 17:43

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Shaun MacDougall is often the target of bullies at his West Dubbo high school. Not because he looks different to anybody else. He maintains a decent level of fitness and generally keeps to himself, going about his business without hurting anybody.

But still, each day the bullies come for him.

The 15-year-old Minore Rd native is victimised and ridiculed because he’s a dreadful sportsman. His physical education teacher hasn’t seen such underdeveloped and ‘simply embarrassing’ hand-eye co-ordination skills in all his twenty years of secondary education.

“I dunno,” said MacDougall. “I’m just not very good at catching or throwing, so that’s what they pick on me for. I’m a pretty good student, hopefully one day I’ll be able to get out of this Springsteen town and make something of myself.”

But until that day comes, when he opens that email that tells him to pack his bags for greener, more tertiary pastures, Shaun’s principal has confirmed that the controversial ‘Safe Schools’ programme won’t be keeping him safe from the more alpha boys in his year group.

“While Shaun is a bright young man with great promise, he really needs to hit the gym or maybe learn how to banana kick or something to that effect,” said Principal Wanda Glenroy.

“I mean, come on. While I don’t expect him to a star, every young man should know the mechanics of how to play a cover drive and send down a few mediums that keep a batsman guessing. Failing that, a young bloke from Dubbo should know how to run lines or throw a cut out,”

The 69-year-old education professional then went on to explain other ways in which Shaun could get the bullies off his back.

“Maybe he shouldn’t wear corduroy trousers to school like it’s 1977? Has he though about that? I haven’t caught him smoking once yet. He just needs to loosen up. This high school is basically a waiting room for the Wellington Correctional Centre anyway. What’s he got to lose?”

More to come.



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