9 February, 2016. 15:23

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Researchers and doctors from Australia’s peak scientific body have concluded after years of study that eating and drinking is linked to almost all forms of cancer.

Earlier today, the CSIRO released a decade-long taxpayer-funded investigation into the cause of cancer – and what they found has ramifications for every Australian who enjoys the occasional bite to eat of quenching drink.

“The conclusions of this study have found that if you eat and drink, there is a risk that of developing cancer during the course of your life,” said lead researcher Dr Graham Carpet.

“In addition to those finding, Australians who enjoy going out in the sun or the occasional joint, a significant cancer risk is also associated with those activities.”

The news has rocked many health-conscious Australians who look to minimise their risk of cancer by making lifestyle changes that promote a long-life.

Blogger Edwina Carlottle hopes to one day live to the ripe of age of 100, starving her future children and grandchildren of an inheritance while she loads her britches with the most God-awful human muck that’d turn any palliative carer green.

“After reading that cancer is becoming contagious and that now eating and drinking also could cause cancer, I’m thinking of getting a feeding tube put in,” said the 39-year-old transit officer.

“Cancer is the leading cause of death in the world, I think. I take precautions with other things, like cardiovascular and skin. It’s good to have the tools to ensure you live a long and happy life.”

More to come.


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