5 October 2016. 12:25


The Chief Executive ANZ bank has texted Malcolm Turnbull to let him know that he wishes he’d never agreed to be his son’s godfather, after appearing before the Standing Committee on Economics to answer questions surrounding problems in its wealth management division and its troubled rural lending business.

This week chief executives from Australia’s big-four banks will face Parliamentary hearing followinga string of scandals.

ANZ chief executive Shayne Elliott faced the inquiry, joined by deputy chief executive Graham Hodges, where he realised that his lifelong business associate and fellow Royal Sydney Golf Club member, Malcolm Turnbull, had thrown him to the wolves.

“u set me up u fkn dog” Elliott texted to Turnbull

“poor form m8”.

“I wish I neva agreed to be alex’s godfather”

However, the unbreakable Malcolm Turnbull refused to be guilt tripped by the rogue finance magnate.

“m8 it’s only day one. The others have got to face the music too. u should be happy I was able to cool off the royal comm.”

“Deadset. Barnaby says don’t leave the city or he rkns some prick will try and shoot u – coulda handled the landmark thing a bit better IMHO”

Mr Elliott responded with simply.

“FFS never an issue under Howard. Ur a fkn bitch”

In his opening remarks at the hearing, Mr Elliott apologised over the treatment of customers of rural lending business Landmark purchased by the bank in 2009.  ANZ was accused of clawing back loans by unfairly fore-closing  on rural properties.

“We acquired the farm lending business Landmark. We accept we should have worked better with customers…this is wrong we should have worked better and we apologise,” he said.

“I would like to ask Barnaby Joyce to please stop calling me in the middle of the night off private numbers,”

“I know it’s you doing the heavy breathing. I’ve also got reason to believe it is you that keeps posting empty bullet cartridges to my office.”


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