In the recent wake of yet more Australian politicians being outed as dual-citizens, top economists and political commentators are speculating the most qualified non-dual citizen eligible for parliament could be former Winter Olympic gold medalist, Steve Bradbury.

Bradbury (43), shot to fame in 2002 after winning gold in the men’s 1000m short track speed skating event after his four leading competitors were involved in a last corner pile up.

Political commentator and bullfrog impersonator Laurie Oakes has speculated that the rapid drop out of pollies is a sure sign of success for Bradbury.

“We’ve seen this before and we’re foolish to ignore the signs. He’ll be leading us with a look of dumbfounded joy in no time.”

Recent new polls indicate Bradbury is the prefered candidate coming into the next election, ahead of Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull and opposition leader, Bill Shorten with a 44% majority.

“And keep in mind a lead means nothing to this guy. He’ll hang in there, he’ll get there.”

When asked whether he’d be challenging for leadership, Bradbury responded with a pre-prepared statement:

“I’ll do it! Why not!”

We have included the video of Bradbury’s 2002 gold medal win because, seriously, how fucking good was it?


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