CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
In Western Australia today, the Liberal Party remains in palliative care after a devastating state election bloodbath over the weekend.
In a scenario not seen since Sir Joh-era Queensland, the state Liberal Party of WA now has less seats then their little brothers in the National Party.
Federally things aren’t going much better, as the embattled Attorney-General and Member for Pearce, Christian Porter notches up three weeks on paid leave while he deals with his branding issues.
On top of that, the Australian Electoral Commission have today confirmed that the Federal seat of Stirling, in Perth’s north, held by Liberal backbencher Vince Connelly, will be axed to reduce WA’s seats by one to a total of 15. The seat’s voters will be moved into to the expanded neighbouring seats.
Unluckily for the Prime Minister, the alleged rapist’s seat of Pearce has been spared from abolition during the voter redistribution in WA, a fine opportunity missed to put this whole thing to bed without ever having to investigate the accusations levelled towards the controversial MP.
Paid Leave Porter, as he is now known, is continuing his efforts to turn these very real historic sex crime allegations into a muddied he-said-she-said situation.
His tactics of using tax-payer dollars to sue the tax-payer funded ABC, while also taking paid mental health leave, don’t appear to be working – after tens of thousands of women rallied across Australia on Monday calling for his resignation.
Now with nothing but Sky News to keep him company in his empty Perth Mansion, Paid Leave Porter has had make an extra effort to enjoy himself on this tax-payer funded holiday.
And today, he might have just found a new hobby.
“Yes my darlings. Burn” Porters whispers at the flames licking up the dry bushlands in Avon Valley National Park, just 50 clicks north of his electorate office.
His eyes flicker with the reflection from his arson attempts in the bushfire-prone crown land.
“Oh you’re getting bigger aren’t you” he hisses, as his mood responds to the pure euphoria pinballing across his brain, for the first time in years.
“Yes you are. Yes you are. My gorgeous orange flower”
“Wait until these news cameras see me helping evacuate families this afternoon. Then we’ll see who the bad guy is”
“Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha”
