The Queensland Government has abandoned one of its most baby-boomer approved policies and will not enforce a 1:00am nightclub lockout that was due to start next week.

Instead, Premier Annastacia Palaszczuk today announced that licensed venues will be asked to improve their dress codes.

“As one of two Premiers with very hard names to pronounce, I agree with Gladys Berejiklian’s attitude towards nightlife. We need to do all we can to make our city look more like a trendy American city like Colorado or something”

The Government will also now require venues in the precincts to scan ID cards of all patrons in order to trade past midnight.

“This is a way of us having complete control over your lives, without looking like we do. It’ll be great to go through the data and see who has been where and with who. It’s actually quite a value commodity that kind of information”

“Shoes are the most important thing. I’m sick of these lowbreeds from outer suburbs and the bush wearing thongs like its 1997. It’s sickening”

SEE ALSO: Townsville Man Accused Of Being A Cop After Wearing Closed-In Shoes To The Pub


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