Local News

Local Lo-Fi band sells out and goes Hi-Fi

30 March, 2017. 13:23 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The third-most prolific shoegaze band in Betoota has shunned their lo-fi sound ahead of the release of their first album next month, citing that they actually have some "pretty good lyrics" and people deserve to hear them. Quran Quran Renault Megane burst onto the East Betoota music scene in 1993, with local chart...

Baby Boomer still thinks it was better in his day despite recent heart-lung transplant

30 March, 2017. 13:23 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact As a part of his ongoing rehabilitation, recent double-transplant recipient Dennis Sparklemein had told everybody from his medical team to his young adult children that he still thinks life as better in his heyday. The 69-year-old revealed to The Advocate that he his generation had real things to worry about such as...

Flat Phone Battery Ruins Concert Experience

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Gregory Caldridge, 19, was unable to be consoled by friends last night after a tragic sequence of events led his mobile telephone to run out of battery midway through a concert. The Brisbane-native made the trip down to the Gold Coast to attend a gig hosted by punk outfit, The Autofellating Anteaters, where he expected to...

Spunky Italian Barista Sends Hot Flush Through Local Mum By Remembering Her Name And Order

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Using all of her primary school Italian in saying thank you to local barista Giovanni 'Jack' Chapmanio, a South Betoota mother of four asked for the air conditioning to be turned down after being personally greeted with her order ready to go by the Italian-national. "Grazie Jacko! Come è ora?" said Angela Ikona, the owner-operator...

Local Prop From Saturday Night Wants To Know If You’re Keen For Round Two

28 March, 2017. 12:23 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A first-grade tighthead prop has taken to social media this afternoon with details of a Saturday night tryst with a local woman - in the hopes of finding her after the mystery woman took off before he woke up. Pavel Mikhailov is playing his fourth season in the Betoota Dolphins number three jersey and played...

Hungover Bloke At Cafe Having Very Loud Phone Conversation About How Mad Last Night Was

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT A noticeably hungover, and possibly still drunk, man is currently informing an entire cafe about how big his night was. While dining alone on a late breakfast, his phone call was rather quiet to begin with. That was until he launched into the story about that bird that Jimmy took home. "She was an absolute sort!" He...

CSIRO launches study into why men spit in the urinal

25 March, 2017. 12:23 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Men are often criticized for not being able to do two things at once, however, most men are able to urinate and spit at the same time - which has become an area of interest for Australia's peak scientific body. Launching a $455m study into why men spit in the urinal before...

Remote Murri Kid Not Good Enough At Footy To Go To Secondary School

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Despite his love of learning, local Murri kid, Jason Ridley (7) has today come to terms with the fact that he probably won't be finishing year twelve. As a young Aboriginal male with a fair bit of pace, everything was looking good for Jason, until he became old enough to play full contact football. "I just don't have the ball...

Young Sikh Man Looking Forward To Another Year Of Being Racially Profiled At Airports And Other Public Buildings

23 March, 2017. 13:23 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Despite putting a Union Jack filter over his Facebook display picture, a local Sikh man has no grand illusions about how he's going to be treated at airports and other public buildings in the wake of yet another terrorist attack linked to Islam. Ranjit Bahadur has been the head of the Betoota...

Rural Bachelor Throws On The Seductive Ankle-Flappers For A Night Out In The Big Smoke

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Ruining yet another pair of stonewash boot cut jeans, a quiet but equally endearing Eromanga man makes no apologies for the fashion faux pas - saying, "it is what it is, then you die." Speaking to The Advocate this morning from the heart, Gregor Norfolk said that his mother often forgets that he's not as...

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