ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

A joint investigation between Dubbo’s Western Plains Zoo and the CSIRO has concluded that nearly all encounters with the elusive yet extinct Tasmania Tiger are filmed on a Nokia 3200.

Many researchers at the nation’s peak scientific body had their interest in the phenomenon piqued this week as yet another video claiming to have captured the Thylacine surfaced online Tuesday.

Predictably, the video was very grainy and any discernable proof from the video is extremely dubious at best.

“That got is thinking,” said Dr Tania Frost, an assistant researcher into Tasmanian Tiger sightings at the CSIRO.

“Why are all the videos purporting to be of the Thylacine always of such poor quality?”

“We here at the CSIRO couldn’t sit on our hands any longer, we just had to find out.”

So with that explosive burst of motivation, Frost and her team set out to find out why these videos are so visually unappealing.

What Tania and her team discovered rocked her to her very core.

Just over four hours into the day-long investigation, Dr Frost had enough evidence to conclude that most of these perverts who film ‘Tasmanian Tigers’ and post the video online are capturing the moment on a Nokia 3200.

“We were all appalled,” said Frost.

“But it all makes sense. As most sane human beings can tell, these animals no longer exist on this planet – and most sane, normal people do not own Nokia 3200s anymore,”

“People who still own and use a Nokia 3200 are not sane, which is enough reason why they think their filming a fucking Tasmania Tiger.”

More to come.



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