ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

The Prime Minister has been forced to duck questions from his greatest mentor this week as former Hillsong Pty Ltd CEO Brian Houston asks Scott Morrison where his “Australia Day” honour is.

But Morrison has replied today, telling Brian that now is not a good time.

“My King,” said Morrison.

“Now isn’t a good time for me. Maybe next year when the heat is off me and I’ve had another miracle election win. Plus, I think that it wouldn’t be the best time for you, either. I say that with the greatest respect, my King,”

“Brother, when we are both private citizens in the future, this needless persecution we receive on a daily basis will end and we can truly live a life true to ourselves.”

The Advocate reached out to Hillsong for comment but only received yet another envelope filled with a suspicious white powder in reply that spilled out onto Clancy’s desk when torn open. He inhaled some of it, accidentally, and now he’s blaming his long COVID for his extreme shortness of breath and loss of vision.

However, Morrison has denied that he was even thinking of giving his close personal friend Brian an Australia Day honour.

“Look, we ran some focus groups on Brian and the results were worse than the NewsPoll today,” laughed Morrison.

“The results said I would in votes if I put a crisp right on Brian’s chin, in public, which I’d never do because I’m not going to be Prime Minister forever! [laughs uncontrollably] No, I am not friends with Brian.”

More to come.


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