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Outgoing Cricket Australia CEO James Sutherland announced his resignation earlier today, making the administrator the latest high-profile scalp to be claimed by the ball-tampering saga of last summer.

Though he claims it has nothing to do with his decision, Sutherland told reporters today in the south that he feels it’s a good time for him – and a good time for the game for him to finish his innings.

When asked what he planned to do next, Sutherland said he plans to retire and work part-time.

As the sandpaper specialist at his local Bunnings.

“I held that job for many years,” said Sutherland.

“But it had nothing to do with the ball tampering last summer, it’s just a coincidence. Albeit as largely unbelievable coincidence. But I digress, I came to the conclusion earlier this week that I’d done all I could as the boss of cricket in this country,”

“Regardless, I’m looking forward to returning to the old job I had back before I got mixed up in the bright lights of the sports administration world. I might even start playing again? Lastly, I’d like to thank Cricket Australia for giving me the opportunity to resign on my own accord and to the fans. Cheers.”

Sutherland then told a Channel Nine reporter to go fuck himself before flipping off the whole media pack.

More not coming, probably.


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