FRANKIE DeGROOT | Local News | Contact

Local parents are rejoicing today after news that regional drug rehabilitation and counselling service Betoota Pathways is now offering an inpatient program to help toddlers with debilitating Wiggles addictions.  

“It’s what this area desperately needs” said young mum Brianna Vito, 19.

“I’ve got Kieran on the waiting list already; I can’t even go near him in the morning if he hasn’t had his Wiggles fix. He wants fruit salad for every meal. He’s doing the propeller all day. It’s tearing the family apart”. 

However, Brianna and other desperate parents may be in for a long wait with only 30 placements available for the program to cater to the greater Betoota South-Western region.

Creator of the program Doctor Alexandra Foyle, 67, says the revolutionary program was delivering positive results and helping dozens of families with young children. 

“It’s a unique type of sensory overload program. What we do is we subject them to a Wiggles barrage. We lock them in room with Wiggles merchandise, and large screen TVs playing Wiggles music non-stop. Over the course of 3 weeks we remove one Wiggle at a time until only Emma is left.”

“Then we remove her too and the TVs start playing Pantera’s 1996 Great Southern Trendkill album at high volume. After 3 days we let them out, and they have totally forgotten about the Wiggles. A few days after that they uncurl from the foetal position and are read to rejoin society”.  

Doctor Foyle added that whilst the results had been positive so far, it was unrealistic to assume that the same technique could be applied to other addictions. 


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