A number of AFL clubs have finished the weekend’s matches with a growing list of injuries, in what can only be described as an explosively physical weekend of toe-to-toe clashes, as the game celebrated it’s annual Indigenous round.

While Queensland and New South Wales prepare for Game I of Origin, the Southerners’ great Winter game also appears to be in full flight, with a few surprising outliers making what looks like a steady finals dash.

In fact, round 11, and the last few weekends leading up to it, have been so octane-charged that Melbourne’s highly-organised African youth gangs have taken a break from their terrifying street crimes that were bringing Victoria to it’s knees earlier in the year.

In January this year the gangs were so visible in their efforts to destroy life for ordinary Australians, that Immigration Minister Peter Dutton was forced to talk about them on the conservative talkback radio station 2GB, where he suggested that people in Melbourne were too scared to go to restaurants.

Following close to twenty African gang-related front pages in a row, Prime Minister Turnbull was also forced to comment on their occasional Airbnb parties and punch-ons on the St Kilda foreshore.

“We don’t know what is happening, but something needs to be done” said Turnbull before handing over to Melbourne-based Coalition Minister, Greg Hunt MP, who had invited the Prime Minister to his electorate to talk about petty youth crimes that are only being reported because the AFL was in off-season.

Hunt said he amount of three or more visibly African teenagers standing in public, possibly making noise or being annoying, is “out of control” in parts of Victoria and tougher sentencing laws are needed – even though police continually insist they are on top of Melbourne’s youth crime problem.

However, as the Herald Sun’s panicked state of emergency appears to relax back to a news cycle covering solely Mick Malthouse thought bubbles and articles about teenagers dislocating their knee caps at the MCG, it can only be assumed that these African gangsters are much less interested in committing crimes when the footy is heating up.

Peter Dutton was approached for comment on this correlation but said the only thing he knows about the AFL is that AFL players tend to play better when he deports their dads.


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