17 May, 2016. 14:15
As we reported yesterday,  San Francisco 49ers punt returner Jarryd Hayne has walked away from the NFL after only one season, to chase another lifelong dream.
His departure has left fans and sporting commentators shellshocked, but Hayne says the Olympic Games in Rio are calling his name and has announced that is set to play for Fiji in the augural Rugby Sevens competition, should he make the team.
Hayne’s incessant use of the term ‘Lifelong dream’ has followed him into two different codes of football, and quite possibly a third – this leaves many of his fans asking – how many lifelong dreams can one have?
“It’s not what you think” said Hayne while talking to media this morning.
“Lifelong dream is just a way of saying I would like to be paid more money, without offending the NRL fanbase,”
“Parramatta were really good to me, but if I’m smashing myself in tackles every weekend, I’m gonna need more than what they can give me.”
“Even breaching the salary cap, they still couldn’t do it,”
As many excommunicated players of the National Rugby League have pointed out in the past, it is very difficult to change codes once you have started your career in rugby league.
Many footballers, including Wendell Sailor, Lote Tuqiri, Mat Rogers and Brad Thorn have been slammed for seeking greener pastures in the higher-paying codes of football, especially considering that they had “everyfin you could f**kin’ ask for” in the League.
“Who needs more than 80k a fuckin year?” says local Parra fan, Braden Noteeth.
“Most ov ’em have got a car too, whiney little shits!”
“One word for ’em… spoilt!”
Karmichael Hunt, while a recurring inclusion to the Brisbane Broncos history books, is still to this day accused of being gay by NRL supporters, after he made the bizarre decision to code-hop to the AFL.
“I couldn’t exactly say it was my lifelong dream, could I?” said Hunt.
“I grew up in New Zealand for fucks sake. I didn’t even know what the AFL was until I started getting offers from the Suns”
“… I think Hayne has played this one really well. No one is going to argue with the blokes dreams,”
Jarryd Hayne agrees.
“Do you honestly think it was a lifelong dream of mine to spend the last 18 months training in three different codes of football in four different countries,”
“It wasn’t that long ago I was crying on camera saying it had been a lifelong dream to win a State Of Origin series… Now I’m going to be represented Fiji in Rio…”
“I was born in fuckin’ Minto!”
“It’s a bout one thing and one thing only. Lifelong C.R.E.A.M”


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