CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
A young family from Betoota Heights appear to be unfamiliar with the concept of a public park, that’s according to yesterday’s antics at the Royal Exchange Hotel.
This comes as the relatively new parents, Mel and Pete Hanna, invited every friend they have to join them in swamping the entire front bar of this iconic pub on a Sunday afternoon – in celebration of their infant son’s second birthday.
This is despite the fact that baby Marlo is not yet able to hold and store memories, let alone recognise half the faces of the bored guests that were forced to waste half of their weekend looking at a crying toddler that seemed a little overwhelmed by the attention, let alone the hyperstimulation of endless sports betting ads blaring on glass surface within 50 metres of him.
The growing trend of infant birthday parties taking place at adult spaces like pubs and surf clubs has become somewhat normalised by millennial parents who don’t like cleaning up after themselves.
While the mere concept of hosting a party for a baby that lacks the general motor skills to remain seated on a bar stool, let alone appreciate the horse racing on the windowless wall behind them, may seem pointless in itself – Mel and Pete’s decision to do it in the middle of the public house almost comes across as obnoxious.
With a long-awaited pay-per-view boxing match on the big screen, and mid-afternoon football fixtures on after that, as well as a TAB machine getting non-stop action from the elderly regulars – it seems that the general pub etiquette went out the window – as the whole venue was forced to host screaming kids who would’ve probably preferred to be eating dirt down the road at the vacant block of land behind the nearest railway overpass.
The fact that mum and dad also bought their own treats for the kiddies was also on the nose, with every guest acutely aware of the glares that were coming their way from the pub manager, as he was forced to take a hit on the kitchen takings due to their being no free tables for any non-infant patrons looking to order a steak special.
However, this does not mean the kitchen won’t come in handy throughout such an important event.
At time of press, the young parents were quizzing the pub chef about where they could get their hands on a couple large bowls filled with water, in case the 30 kilogram family labrador they brought with them gets thirsty.