LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
A panel of three news presenters you have never heard of, toasted to their 1,000th live discussion about homework today.
Although it is now widely known a three way daytime satellite chat is only interesting if the presenters are arguing about wearing the same colour, the panel of three decided to celebrate the milestone of discussing a pretty clear cut issue for the 1,000th time.
The uncanny valley of almost recognisable faces spoke to the audience of PM daytime TV viewers, some live from the studio and one before the harbour of a place reportedly called “Darwin.”
Beginning by citing a ten year old report that suggested homework might be bad, the panel launched into a feverish discussion about how they don’t know anything about the homework their children receive, leaving out the part about how they’re media jobs keep them out of their children’s lives.
“I don’t know about you guys but I am not happy with how much homework my kids are getting,” stated reporter Tim Glumfield knowing full well how his other panelist felt about it.
“I don’t know how to do it! They don’t know how to do it! Science doesn’t know! No one knows!”
As per the national laws of daytime TV, talk quickly turned to how things were when they were young, how kids should be kids and that homework might actually be a bad thing for their upper middle class children.
“I used to play on the street!” yelled all three panelists at the same time.
