LOUIS BOURKE | Culture| CONTACT
Regional clothing outlet ‘Janet’s Closet & Things’ has a proud history of providing over 50s Diamantina women with the garments and accessories they need to look like a substitute English teacher or a friend of your aunt.
Due to the nation’s ageing population, the alleged boutique has seen an increase in revenue allowing the store’s management to increase their marketing spend, the crown jewel of which is a grotesquely painted mannequin with a face that looks ready to scare the living fuck out of you.
Being placed in the shop front on Wednesday, the new mannequin has already drawn attention from the township, garnering a reputation for frightening children and making dogs bark at it.
“I think it’s nice,” stated short-sighted store owner Janet Greer (64).
“She’s turned lots of heads.”
Greer has named the instantly-infamous mannequin Samantha, although many residents have opted to call this demonic reject of Satan himself ‘Sinister Sam.’
“Walking home the other night, nearly lost every liquid in my body when I made eye contact with it,” stated local alcoholic Bernie Evers (54).
“Don’t you think it looks like that girl who went missing all those years ago?”
While it cannot be denied reactions for Samantha have been mixed, Greer maintains that purchasing this mannequin was a sensible business investment.
“What’s great about this mannequin is that it is a smart mannequin that poses itself too. Every morning when I get in it has moved to another position. One morning its head was facing backwards. How cool is that?”
