World News

“Jesus fucking Christ! This is what I call a wall!”: Trump in awe of Vatican walls

24 May, 2017. 15:23 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Taking time out of his hectic European and Middle Eastern tour, President Donald Trump stood in awe of the Vatican City's vast stone walls that were built in the 800s to protect the Pope from barbarian invasions. "This is what I was talking about during the election," he said. "These were the walls...

Traveller Checking Into Business Class Lounge Obviously Flying Economy

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Wendy Plod is heading to Europe. The 25-year-old leasing agent at South Betoota's Property Shop has been slaving and saving for months. Months and months. But now it's time to let the good times roll. "I'm landing in Istanbul first," she said. "The ancient city of Istanbul, I can't wait. Then I'll slowly make my way...

India’s Tuk-Tuk Drivers Bust Out The Wheelies In Memory Of The Late Roger Moore

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The people of Rajasthan in Northern India have today paid tribute to their favourite Bond actor, by doing what he loved. Wheelies in tuktuks. British actor Roger Moore, who took secret agent James Bond to the subcontinent, died on Tuesday aged 89, his family have confirmed. Moore played the role of James Bond for 12 years, adding to the character...

Hillary Clinton reveals she did a way better job leaking information to Russia

18 May, 2017. 14:34 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Former US presidential hopeful Hillary Clinton revealed to the media today that in her opinion, she would've been way better suited to leak classified information to Russia as she's been doing it well before and much better than Donald Trump. Mrs Clinton came under heavy scrutiny during the election campaign for using...

“Just have them shot”: Putin shares tips with Trump on dealing with the media

16 May, 2017. 10:23 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Russian president Vladamir Putin has taken time out of his busy afternoon schedule to explain to his American counterpart that hostile journalists are easier to deal with after they've been shot in the base of their skull and left to rot in the street like a traitor. US president Donald Trump eagerly took...

Trump Appoints New FBI Director To Investigate Especially Heinous Crimes

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT President Trump has today given a tour of the White House to his newly appointed FBI Director, Sergeant Fin Tutuola from the New York Police Department's Special Victims Unit. Speaking to the media today, Trump was quick to point out that as a proud New Yorker, it was imperative that he had an FBI director with the same kind of...

Australia Actually Going To Send Someone Good To Eurovision Next Year, Like Thirsty Merc

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Despite a bold performance by our very own Isaiah Firebrace at the Eurovision Song Contest grand final in Kiev last night - Australian organisers have today confirmed that they are actually going to send a sure bet next year. Isaiah looked a little nervous during his internationally broadcasted gig as he negotiated the pressure of following in the footsteps of...

Trump Suggests Lucy Turnbull Join Melania In The Kitchen While The Men Talk

 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The Former-Lord Mayor of Sydney and high-profile Australian businesswoman has today learnt that her illustrious career and emotional intelligence is not really something that matters when dining with a former-reality TV star who became President. Mrs Turnbull joined her husband, President Donald Trump and first lady Melania Trump to commemorate the 75th anniversary of the Battle...

Lynx Targets Tech Start Up Market With New Fragrance: Elon’s Musk

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Serial entrepreneur Elon Musk has teamed up with Anglo-Dutch company Unilever to create his own fragrance, which is set to be on shelves worldwide by the end of the year. Lynx Elon's Musk is a 'labour of love' for the South African-born businessman, who said he's always wanted to enter the fragrance market but didn't have the...

World Runs Out Of Obscure Animals For Indie Bands To Name Themselves After

LEROY PERCIVAL | Music Editor | CONTACT The World Wildlife Federation (WWF) has today conceded it has run out of animals across the globe for indie bands to use in their names. There has been an explosion in recent years with acts like Husky, Fleet Foxes, Gorillaz and Boy & Bear joining the likes of The Eagles, The Monkees and The Byrds in chucking an...

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