The Nation

ABC Media Watch Now Solely Focused On Explaining The Internet To Old People

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Local old person, John Solander (67) says that he didn't know people could read news online until about a fortnight ago. "I just thought that bloody thing was for pornography and terrorists recruiting, I had no idea that they were publishing news on it..." he said. "Media Watch has been explaining a lot of this too me. Did you know...

National Art School Students Vow To Keep Painting As Baird Replaces Teachers With Pokie Machines

18 July, 2016 16:45 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT The uncomfortably youthful and open-minded students from the National Art School have today vowed to keep attempting to learn, despite the fact that their teachers are gradually being replaced by state-sanctioned pokie machines - as the NSW State Government decides what to do with some perfectly good real estate not too far from the...

Plans to put Sonia Kruger out to pasture on Sky News gains traction

18 July, 2016. 15:45 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact FOLLOWING COMMENTS SHE MADE on the Today Show this morning, the Nine Network has announced plans to put Sonia Kruger 'out to pasture' on Sky News until she retires. The Toowoomba girl called for Australia to stop taking in Muslim migrants, citing a recent article by News Corp columnist Andrew Bolt, which linked terrorism...

Entrepreneurial tramp has PayPass™ terminal installed on forehead

18 July, 2016. 12:34 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact THE SEISMIC FINANCIAL SHIFT TOWARD a cashless economy is doing the nation's homeless out of the job, a recent report has suggested. Australians are, on average, carrying less cash than ever before. Only a generation ago,  there was no option than to have some folding stuff or a chequebook in your back pocket. Now,...

Ex-Private Schooler Receives 5th Section Ten After Being Caught With Some Round Ones

JASON CUTJAR | Forensics editor | Contact A Mosman man has again escaped conviction after appearing at the Downing Centre Local Court on Friday afternoon. Charged with possessing a commercial quantity of a prohibited drug, after being found with 8 capsules of MDMA, Mr Charles Fishburn assured the Court “this will never happen again”.   Initially denying responsibility for the MDMA, claiming...

Officials fish leaves, drowned cat out of Rio Olympic pool ahead of opening ceremony

14 July, 2016. 13:34 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact PREPARATIONS FOR THE RIO Olympic Games are at fever pitch, with leaves and a dead cat being fished out of the Olympic Pool ahead of the opening ceremony of August 5. Said to be stiffer than a surfboard and skinner than a rake, the sodden feline was just one of countless mammals...

Launceston Police are hunting the “Inceston Bandit”

12 July, 2016. 15:34 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact THERE IS A VANDAL IN the Tasmania brothel town of Launceston who keeps defacing signs bearing the city's name - and police want to talk to him. Dubbed the "Launceston Bandit" by The Daily Examiner, the identity of the pervert is unknown. However, footprints found near the scene of one of the...

“Pokémon GO Has Nothing On Snake II” Says Toowoomba Man

11 July, 2016. 11:05 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact When it comes to travelling around an augmented reality capturing token prizes, Toowoomba man Antony Grant (37) says Pokémon GO has nothing on the skillset required to reach level 220 with nothing more than four buttons and a 84 × 48 pixel pure monochrome display. The 32-year-old telemarketer from Toowoomba, QLD says he is often...

NSW Premier Mike Baird Calls For State-Wide Ban On Ball Pits

9 July, 2016. 11:05 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | Contact New South Wales premier Mike Baird has announced plans to ban all ball pits in the state by 1 July, 2017. The decision follows an inquiry into the industry following revelations of some kids peeing in ball pits, and other one-off circumstances that suggest that toey high schoolers sometimes have sex in them. Baird has called for...

Derryn Hinch to keep backup liver in the freezer in case he wins a full 6-year term in Senate

6 July, 2016. 16:45 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact CONTROVERSIAL SENATOR-ELECT Derryn Hinch has revealed this afternoon that he's secured a backup liver just in case he wins a full 6-year term in the upper house. Speaking today at the Sydney's Powerhouse Museum, where his original liver has been on display since 2013, the 72-year-old Kiwi-native announced that he's found a compatible...

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