In humbling news for anyone who used to go to Soundwave, mosh pits are out and picnic blankets are in, The Advocate can report.

The news comes as former Kerrang! readers across the nation have been spotted over the last several months enjoying screamo tunes from the comfort of a Kmart picnic rug paired with a nice $14 glass of festival wine.

With acts like Paramore, Evanescence and the Good Things Festival having just played on outdoor stages across the land, promoters have told The Advocate they’ve been forced to change concert layouts to meet the needs of aging fans whose knees can’t take ten hour stints on concrete anymore.

“The days of moshing in Vans at Eastern Creek raceway until your feet bleed are sadly over,” Sydney music promoter Amy Maddah (55) told The Advocate.

“It seems fans are just as happy to sit on a picnic rug and take in the musical vista, just like their parents do when they go watch Rod Stewart play at a Hunter Valley vineyard.”

Asked if the behaviour of concert goers has also seen a shift, Amy says the over 30s crowd have chilled out so much the promoter can hire less crowd control.

“Most of the psycho blokes that used to climb some stage rigging to backflip into the crowd have really mellowed out, some now just stand by the trees and watch their toddlers climb them instead.”

“At least the kids have cool names though, I heard one tatted up bloke call out to his twins Atreyu and Thrice. That’s pretty mad!”


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