For young professional Calum Jones (26) ordering a large skim cappuccino is hard enough to do without feeling judged, especially at his local cafe where barista Isaac Banon (30) asserts authority by loudly announcing Jones’s order as “tall skinny cap!”

“It’s bullshit. He knows my name, he asks for it, still yells out “tall skinny cap” every time anyway. Fuckwit.”

Jones says a large cappuccino on skim milk became his drink of choice due to his need for additional caffeine with a hint of chocolate while also trying to be a little healthy.

While not overly embarrassed by his coffee order, Jones admits it’s somewhat emasculating when Banon announces his order as a “skinny cap!”

“Where did he get skinny from? You don’t go to the shops and buy skinny milk. He’s doing it to fuck with me I swear.”

We reached out to Isaac Banon for comment and he immediately confirmed Jones’s suspicions.

“It’s what WE call it”

Banon states that while he believes toxic masculinity might be a problem, that doesn’t mean he’s going to stop referring to Jones’s skim cappuccino as anything but a skinny cap.

“I work here 50 hours a week and I just got my penalty rates cut. Calum makes more in a quarter than I do in a year sitting on his ass and leering at interns. Fuck him, let him have his skinny cap alright.”


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