Proving that an oldie can still be a goodie, the soap opera Neighbours has clearly been taking promotional tips from industrial rug outlets.

Known for TV ads that could deafen God, rug outlets are also notorious for promoting their ‘closing down’ sales with heavily discounted prices.

However, everyone who didn’t just fall off the cabbage truck knows that these rug outlets are never actually closing down but are merely doing so to grab attention by increasing urgency and scarcity.

And now this tactic has been used on the viewers of Neighbours who tuned in to see the finale this year only to find out the show is returning in the type of twist that is rather on brand for a soapie.

“You won’t hear me complaining!” stated Neighbours viewer Marcia Griegg, whose husband hoped a free half hour a day would help them to heal from the years of time wasted.

“But seriously, I do feel like I’ve been taken for a ride a bit. We had that big finale and it really seemed like things were laid to rest.”

“The first evening it wasn’t on I stepped outside. It was the first time I had ever seen my front yard at 6:30pm. I saw my agapanthus bobbing in the breeze that caressed my cheeks. Spied a local cat saunter away with rebellious recluse as I step foot in his kingdom. My neighbours, the true kind, return from work into the embrace of children as they grasped them with the promises of lines unscripted. The headlights of my husbands car, which was once ‘the car’, as he pulled into our driveway, stepping out to the silence of the engine and the spring of his grin which spoke writ with joy; ‘Darl’.” 

“I witnessed the world.”

“And now that I’ve done that it’s definitely time for more Neighbours again! Might even buy a new rug to celebrate! Where’s a good closing down sale when you need one?”


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