ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

A controversial comment from the Reserve Bank today has a lot of hard-working senior Australians up in arms over claims the nation would be better off if they all just died.

Philip Lowe, Governor of the Reserve Bank Of Australia, made the comments this afternoon during a presentation to shareholders and investors in Sydney.

“Young people want fast internet, higher wages, affordable housing and some tangible career prospects. Unreasonable, I know,” he said.

“Our research indicates none of those things will happen until the Baby Boomers are all dead,”

“They won’t happen because these things cost money and the money needs to come from the people who’ve spent a lifetime hoarding it. So by that rationale, we can’t see living conditions improve until at least 2040.”

The statement has outraged a prominent outspoken Betoota Grove Baby Boomer, who lashed out at the suggestion that the nation would be better off if he was dead.

Dennis Peters told our reporters that the young people of Australia need to be more thankful for the utopia his generation has made for the Gen X population and the Millennials.

“So you want me to keel over and die. Give all my money to my kids to get a start in life? I don’t have any money!”

“I’m sick of hearing it. The Baby Boomers did the thankless job of building a nice, safe place for our kids to live. Will the country be better if all the broke Baby Boomers die as well?”

Yes, according to the Reserve Bank.

“They will clog up the public health system. We could be building cool things like bullet trains and bullet internet. Instead, most of the budget will go to old age pensions and the related health care,”

“Our advice is to hold tight if you’re a young Australian. When your parents are dead, you will finally get the things you feel entitled to.”

More to come.


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