After two decades of rapid developments in CGI, one local gamer has realised that not much gets his blood pumping the same way the heavily pixelated strippers in the 1996 PC game Duke Nukem 3D did.

A recent report by the ACMA has found that the entire Australian gaming community has never been able to get over these particular female extras, even after the release of several games which literally show protagonists having sex.

Even after experimenting with a range of drugs, the 32-year-old IT consultant, Joseph Madden says he just can’t find the same thrills he experienced while secretly flirting with the animated pole dancers at 13 years old.

“It was so good” Joe.

“Man, I had the hot air blowing out of the Windows desktop into my family computer room, with my foot stretch out trying to hold the door shut so mum couldn’t see the perverted content on the screen”

As a first-person shooter game similar to Doom, the gameplay of Duke Nukem 3D involves moving through levels presented from the protagonist’s point of view, shooting enemies on the way. The environments in Duke Nukem 3D are highly destructible and interactive; most props can be destroyed by the player – including the strippers.

“I accidentally exploded a couple strippers with a grenade once” said Joe.

“I really couldn’t forgive myself for that. I made sure I was always very courteous to female game characters from that point on, even the sex workers”


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