WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet |CONTACT
A local sad case is under fire today for an extremely controversial decision.
Just over halfway through a full-blown overseas boys’ trip, Jayden Norris says he just needs a few hours to himself.
After 7 days of frenetic hedonism in a foreign, Jayden says he’s actually ‘had enough of these cunts.’
The pathetic local coward has reportedly informed his mates that he actually is gonna just chill out a bit today – rather than start 15 hours of binge drinking and chain-smoking at 10:30 am.
With breakfast provided by whoever owns the villa the 12 blokes are staying in, half a season of Rick and Morty finished on the tv (some weird morning tradition one of the boys decided on) and deep house absolutely thumping out of the waterproof bose speaker, Norris is apparently weirdly not in the mood to get his empty body and splitting brain straight back into it.
It’s a move that has not been received too well by some of the crowd, with Chief Energy Officer (CEO) Brad Elks reportedly giving him multiple sprays before eventually sulking off to the pool to drink with a few of the other boys.
With a bunch of grazes down his right side, which is presumably from coming off a scooter at some point last night, Elks is apparently pretty close to a dummy spit.
Something which the naughtiest of his mates have sensed.
“I just need a few hours,” pleaded Norris, with two of the boys attempting to physically drag him out of bed.
“I’m fucked alright,” said the local coward who thinks lying in bed for a few hours instead of getting fucked up for an 8th day straight is acceptable.
“Nah deadset, fuck off,” he said, donkey kicking his mate in the chest before copping another spray.
With a number of other boys now audibly talking shit about him in the pool, a few others look on in envy of the warm sweat-stained sheets.
It’s not known when young Norris plans to rejoin the group, but it’s believed a drunken altercation or friendship damaging personal sledge is highly likely to come at some point tonight.
More to come.
