Despite not having watched an episode of Masterchef since Julie Goodwin and Poh were running around, groups of mates are currently placing exorbitant amounts of money on the outcome of this week’s finale based on far fetched tips off from back office staff at Ten.
The Betoota Advocate has launched a surveillance project into a local group chat, and uncovered the following revelations…
“Yea so my mate is good mates with a bloke who knows the Assistant Producer, and he said it’s Larissa” Jack assured his mates, much to the disgust and disagreement of those around him.
“That’s not what I’ve heard. A few boys from my old school in Melbourne, said that the word in Melbourne is Tessa is a lock” Dan staunchly argued.
Like an underpaid George Calombaris sous chef, those who had jumped on Ben felt incredibly aggrieved to have heard Dan’s opposing view.
“What makes you confident in that though?” the group cried at once.
“Well I got a screenshot, from a mate, which he got sent to him from a bloke at his work, who knows a girl who was at the filming of the finale. And having been there for the recording she said that Larissa wins” Dan protested before the court.
Not long after Dan’s latest tip, the hottest tip of all arrived. “Spencer screenshotted this chat” “Jack screenshotted this chat” “Gus screenshotted this chat” Notifications were flying left, right and centre. What could it be?!? This must be good!
A moment of silence fell over the group, as Simon supporters begun to question why on eath they had lumped their monthly salary on an amateur chef winning a reality TV show which they have never watched before. How could their tip off be wrong?
Faster than George can rip of 7.8 million worth of wages, the black sheep of the group piped up to break the unnerving silence. “You lads realise Masterchef records multiple endings?”
“Fuck off Macca” the group exclaimed at once, finally something all the self-proclaimed “Investors” could agree on. The reality of this fact, clearly striking a nerve with some heavily invested punters.
The ensuing days have involved each member of the group trying to find further evidence as to why their tip off is correct, in an attempt to extradite their gambling demons. In fact it’s understood some of the boys even tuned into Sunday’s episode to check in on the contestant’s form and provide their own Matt Preston-like critique.
More to come…
