EFFIE BATEMAN Lifestyle Contact

A woman who has lived in Sydney for a few months has unfortunately stumbled upon the biggest gripe for music appreciators living in the cockroach city, which is having to deal with the Cunnovajoint ‘Qudos Bank Arena’, located in the Bumfuck Idaho known as Homebush.

Originally from Brisbane, Kayla Stewart had no idea how spoiled she’d been with venues such as the Suncorp Stadium and Bowen Hills showground, located close to both the city and train stations. 

Kayla tells The Advocate that she used to be a lot more lax when it came to buying concert tickets, but that she now has to have a good think about whether an artist is really worth the two hour commute.

“Every time a popular artist I like comes to town, I know they’ll be at the fucking Qudos Arena”, says Kayla, “which is an hour away on the train, if you’re lucky.”

“Or 45 minutes by car, but I don’t own one, and neither do many of my friends.”

“I would rather fly to Perth than see a one off show in Homebush.”

Kayla explains that she reached her pain point when she attended Knockout Outdoor a few weeks ago, which holds the title of the biggest  ‘                 .’

“I need you to imagine what it’s like to be around tens of thousands of people off their chops, trying to get home on a single train line all at once”, she explains, “it was such as a sensory overload I had to take a $100 Uber home.”

“And guess where they’re going to hold the Sydney boiler room, a.k.a the pinger superbowl?’


“The argument that it’s close to Western Sydney is bullshit. It’s just as hard for them to get there. It’s convenient for nobody but those poor suckers that live that cracked Opal tower”

“I think I’m going to have to stick to less popular artists and hope to fuck they choose the Hordern Pavillion instead.”

More to come.


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